That Lasted Long ...

TAMPA, FLORIDA (TICKER) —In a stunning move, the Tampa Bay Lightning on Friday fired head coach Barry Melrose.

Associate coach Rick Tocchet was named as Melrose’s replacement.

I said he wouldn't last the season, but I thought he would make it through Christmas. Oh well. Hopefully he won't take Barnaby's job back at ESPN.

Keep an eye out on BMR for a suicide watch ...

It is indeed official.

It's Official ...

The Tampa Bay Lightning have signed defenseman Marek Malik to a one-year contract today, executive vice president and general manager Brian Lawton announced.

"We are thrilled to have signed Marek to a contract,” Lawton said. “He is a big body, at 6-foot-5 220 pounds, that will add to our overall defensive play and give us veteran leadership on the blue line."

Hahahahaha. My feelings towards Mr. Malik are well known and I just have to wonder what Lawton is thinking or how he has fooled himself into believing that Malik may suddenly use that "big body" since he never has in his career to date. I thought things were taking a turn for the better in Tampa and this move just makes me scratch my head. If they were still winless and listless, then ok, they should try anything to get the ship righted, but they just won a game and maybe saved their coach's career. I don't get it ...

But either way, best of luck to the Bolts - y'all will need it. Do you think Malik will send his former coach Tom Renney a letter? Ha!

Lol @ Lightning

Thanks to Puck Daddy for passing along the story from Lightning Strikes:

Marek Malik could be the next addition to the Lightning's ever-evolving defense. The 6-foot-5, 233-pound unrestricted free agent is expected in Tampa this week, though it is unclear if he will sign a one-year, $1-million contract or practice as a tryout.

The comments below the story are also priceless but I just love Arto's who summed it up by saying "I don't like Malik in our team at all."

Arto, neither did we. Neither did we.

In all seriousness, I have been surprised no one took a flier on Kalinin Malik so far. He does have some experience and knows how to play in a defensive system (even if he can't pull it off). I figured at least he would head back home into the deep forest with the other sasquatch to the Czech Republic and play but is Tampa really that desperate? I don't understand why the Lightning would go after a softie like Malik when Mullet Melrose is demanding hard work. Even when Lurch makes an effort, he looks like he is cruising at half speed.

This just isn't a smart move. Malik has the unfortunate tendency of putting the puck on (and in) his own net from time to time; aren't the Bolts goaltenders under enough pressure already from opposing shooters?

I Hope Barry Melrose Gets Shot

From the AP:

ESPN hockey analyst Barry Melrose apologized Tuesday for negative remarks about the area around the New Jersey Devils' new Prudential Center arena.

In a video segment posted on ESPN.com last week, Melrose described the recently opened arena as a "beautiful new building" but added, "Don't go outside if you have a wallet or anything else, because the area around the arena is just horrible."

Newark Mayor Cory A. Booker and Municipal Council President Mildred Crump took exception to the remarks and called for Melrose to apologize.

And he did:

"I was trying to be funny and I'm sorry it didn't come through that way," (Melrose) said by phone from St. Louis. "No excuse. When I talk I don't want to offend anybody. I love hockey and I want Newark to be a success. I certainly never wanted to hurt the feelings of the people of Newark or the people of New Jersey. There was no malice on my part."

Now that isn't even the best part:

"All of us make mistakes, but it's a shame when it's at the expense of 300,000 people," Booker said, referring to Newark's population.

Yeah, because the population of the mainly African American city really cares about what an idiot white Canuck with a mullet has to say.

Melrose went on to say that he wants to go to Newark and tour the city and have lunch with the mayor.

I like Booker, he is trying to reinvigorate his city and improve its image. Melrose, however, is a fool. As the movie quote (sorta) goes, all a man has in this world is his word and his balls, and he shouldn't break them for anyone. Melrose made a crack and should stand by it. Granted he never actually went to Newark before saying it, but if he opened his mouth he should stand by his comments and back them up with the astoundingly high crime statistics.

But he didn't, he rolled over and apologized. How great would it be if when he goes for that lunch for Booker he got mugged??!?!? Ha!